“If you wear revealing clothes, it’s your own fault if you get raped.”
WRONG! No one ever deserves, or asks to be raped no matter what they wear. To say that is like saying that someone is asking to be mugged because they are carrying a bag, or someone is asking to have their house burgled because they have a nice television. This is just a way of excusing the behaviour of men who rape or abuse.
“If someone takes you out and spends a lot of money on you they are entitled to something in return.”
WRONG! Sex should involve an equal decision between two people. You have the right to say ‘No’ to sexual activity at any point, whether or not someone has paid for your night out, drinks, meal, clothes etc.
“Rape isn’t that serious – it’s just sex when you don’t want it.”
WRONG! Rape is not the same as sex. For the survivor, it is a violent act over which they have no control and during it many people fear for their lives
“But if it was your partner, it doesn’t count as rape – especially if you’ve had sex with them before.”
WRONG! If you didn’t want it, it’s rape: even if you’ve consented to sex before. You have the right to say no at any time, even while having sex.
“Only weird strangers are rapists. Never people you actually know.”
WRONG! The most common rapists are the survivor’s partner, and 97% of callers to the Rape Crisis England and Wales helpline knew the perpetrator before they were raped.
“Only gay men and boys are sexually violated.”
WRONG! Heterosexual, gay and bisexual males are equally likely to be sexually violated. Being sexually violated has nothing to do with your current or future sexual orientation. Your sexuality has no more to do with being violated than being robbed.